Dressing For The Inner Me

Here’s a brief excerpt from comments I made during a facebook conversation today. It happened on my current profile photo. The conversation amused me so much that I thought I should share it:

(On the topic of what clothes to wear to church) “I should just turn up one day dressed as the inner me…which will presumably be barefoot, wearing spiritual wanderer pilgrim style clothes crossed with sci-fi sensibilities with my hair down to my waist carrying the Bible printed on a papyrus scroll or something…”

I can just imagine turning up to church looking like that. I think it would very quickly divide people – there’d be those who encourage the whole free spirit attitude; the rest who desperately want to be all-embracing but would feel somewhat uncomfortable. As I also mentioned in the conversation, the current dress trend among fellow 20-something year old members of our church seems to be skinny jeans, tight bicep-revealing shirts (for the guys) and loose shirts with lots of necklaces for the girls. Then there’s me – flared or boot cut jeans, skate shoes and novelty t-shirts. That’s my safe mode of dressing. Believe me when I say that if my budget could handle it I would be dressing more like some pseudo-Goth-Jedi Knight(ess)-greenie-forest dweller-spiritual wanderer. Funny that what I perceive as more “natural” (or just more me) is potentially more expensive! And let’s face it, jeans and t-shirt isn’t a particularly confronting.

And, in random news, recently I’ve been taking a lot more interest in lingerie and clothes. What’s happening to me!?

Veganism, joint facebook accounts and dress shopping

Yes, more musings. It’s probably a sign I’ve been reading too much. Or not socialising enough.

Day 2 of attempted vegan eating and, whoops, I ate honey. And egg pasta. Oh well. I am a lacto-ovo vegetarian to be precise (though that doesn’t necessarily entail a particularly large intake of either dairy or eggs). Dairy usually makes me sick. I maintain my position (as I have for 15 years) that I will not deliberately consume something that causes the direct death of another sentient creature… but after my first foray into veganism I discovered that, honestly, I found cheese and free range eggs too hard to resist. I could go on and on, but I won’t. As it is, my honours dissertation is revolving around these topics. So it’s moved from “personal interest” to “homework”; therefore, I will desire to avoid it in my free time.

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Things I find weird? People who have a joint facebook account with their spouse. E.g. “JohnAndJane Jones” (made that up, not referring to a specific individual.) Why do people do that? They then have to sign every post with a clarifier: “Oh, by the way, it’s John here.”

What’s the deal with it? Is it because they have only one email address? Hmm… it can’t be money concerns, can it? Tried hotmail, gmail, yahoo mail or any of the free mail services out there? Is your Internet Service Provider so darn tight that they won’t give you more than one email account if you prefer that style of thing? Is it because they are so emotionally fused (to borrow a concept from Dr Schnarch) that they can’t possibly give each other free rein?

My husband and I have separate accounts. It’s great. I can write all over his facebook wall while he’s at work. That, and I’d like to think that, even though we are “one flesh” and all that, we do carry ourselves as individuals… That, and he’s clicking the Like button on bands and stuff that I definitely don’t like. I don’t want to be mistaken for “liking” the same sort of music.

*And for goodness’ sake, don’t assume that just because most people on the Internet are grumpy / angry that I am somehow in an accusative or vindictive mood right now. I am amused by it, more than anything. Though I will add that out of well over 300 facebook ‘friends’ (most of whom I do count as real life friends… the joys of being from a large extended family and a megachurch), I don’t have one that is living a fused social networking life with their spouse.

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Bought a new dress today. Very happy with it. It’s black, it’s covered in hot pink cat shapes, and it was roughly 60% off the original price. Yay for end-of-season fashions!

Thinking aloud: reclaiming identity and beauty

Is it possible to become simultaneously less judgemental yet more shallow?

I ask the question because I realise, as I look around the shopping centre, that these days I am far less likely to judge other people based on their outwards appearance; yet more likely to spend an effort on my own appearance.

Is paying attention to personal grooming actually shallow, anyway?

As I hit my late 20s, I reflexively observe that I am starting to claim and reclaim aspects of my personal identity that were not a high priority for me in my teens.

I am a mother, and I claim that as part of my identity. I also stand firm in my belief that to be a mother is not equivalent to losing all sense of self-esteem, nor is it an excuse to pay less attention to my outwards appearance. I have often thought this in my just-over 8 years of parenthood (9 years, if you count pregnancy as parenthood). It was once again highlighted for me recently when I noticed that at least a few mums (moms, for the North American readers!) spend a lot of money and effort on clothes for their children, but dress themselves extremely casually (not that I particularly care if a mum wants to dress in trackie dacks and ugg boots, but be assured, that’s not for me!).

I have Anglo-Celtic heritage – more Celtic than Anglo – with a bit of French somewhere in the background. I claim that as a significant aspect of my ethno-cultural identity, as an  Anglo-Celtic Australian. It is a package deal: don’t pick on me for my super pale white skin, and don’t pick on my many immediate family members with their red hair – it’s nothing but poorly disguised racism. I would never dare to attack someone because they’re “not tanned enough”, and thus I make a stand. I don’t wear fake tan, either. It looks stupid on me. I don’t sunbathe – certainly not with the high skin cancer statistics: two in three Australians will be diagnosed with skin cancer before the age of 70, according to the SunSmart website (article dated March 2010, accessed 2 September 2010).

However, I digress. I have spent far too long worrying about people not liking me for who I am. I am learning to accept myself and others, at the same time I am learning to spend more effort on “looking good”. My question is, then, are these things mutually exclusive?

On the topic of looking good, I recently read a great book: The Science of Sexy: Dress to fit your unique figure with the style system that works for every shape and size by Bradley Bayou (2006 edition) [Amazon]. I highly recommend it for women like myself who want to do the best they can with the figure they’ve got. I found it light-hearted, practical and realistic, and am now in the process of trying  to implement its advice in my wardrobe and accessories.

The short story is that it dawns upon me that life is far too short to be wasted on picking on other people for their clothing style, haircut, and body shape. Yes, I know that this is elementary Christianity*, and elementary feminism, all rolled into one, but to have a deep down illumination and revelation of this is another matter altogether. It’s one thing to have head knowledge, it’s another thing to live it from the heart. And it’s yet another thing to live in such a way that offers freedom to others. Life also seems far too short to spend living half-hearted – and for me, reclaiming my feminine identity is part of this process of living life to the full.

*It saddens me that very few Christian women authors appear willing to take a stance against the cultural-structural images of womanhood. Most of the Christian women’s texts on beauty that I have read centre more on the theme of “God loves you even if everyone else thinks you’re ugly,” rather than what I believe is the sociologically far more appropriate “Culturally designed notions of beauty are historically, ethnically, socially positioned beliefs that are not foundational to  Biblical interpretations of beauty.”

Easter T-Shirt Design

T-Shirt –

http://flokot.redbubble.com/sets/30716/works/2898300-1-inri-inspired-by-easter

As an Art Print and Greeting Card – http://flokot.redbubble.com/sets/31396/works/2898307-2-inri-inspired-by-easter

RedBubble Profile – http://www.redbubble.com/people/flokot

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Here’s my latest t-shirt design, which is available for purchase at RedBubble.Com. I entitled it “INRI,” which is an abbreviation of the Latin for, “Jesus of Nazereth, King of the Jews,” that is often seen on images of the Cross in Roman Catholic Churches. That said, as always my art here is intended as a non-denominational celebration of the foundational aspects of Christianity that followers of Jesus hold in common.

While I do not have time to go into great detail here, I thought that a brief summary of the Gospel message is in order:

– in the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth and they were perfect. There was no suffering or death.

– Satan was a great angel who, in his pride, sought to take God’s place. As a result, he Fell and became the Devil. He is not the exact opposite of God, but rather a corrupted, and very powerful, creature.

– God appointed the first humans to be his representatives on Earth. However, they gave up their authority by obeying the Devil. Later, in the Gospels, the Devil is seens as telling Jesus that he (the Devil) was given all authority on the Earth (see Luke 4:6). All that was under the dominion of Humanity was now the Devil’s.

– This was the beginning of the Curse, the entrance of death and suffering into human existence. The punishment for humanity’s sin (disobedience to God’s commands) is death. All humans who have since existed inherit this sin from their fathers. However, God promises to one day send one who will be of the seed of a woman – not a man. The only way for men or women to reach God is through the shedding of blood of an innocent individual.

– God the Son, one of the three persons of the Trinity (the Trinity being One God who is represented in Three Individual but Indivisible Persons… phew! I know, it can be such a mystery, can’t it?!), took on human flesh. That is, though He remained fully God, He was also fully man. He was born of a Jewish Virgin, but not of a human father. God the Father was His Father.

– Jesus lived a short life, but in only three years of ministry transformed the world. His ideas were radical and often offensive to the people of His day, who plotted to kill Him. The Devil probably thought that he had won by killing Jesus… but, in the shedding of Jesus’ innocent blood, the perfect payment for all human sin was made.

– After three days in the Tomb, Jesus rose again and subsequently appeared to hundreds of people before being lifted to Heaven. He sent the Holy Spirit of God to live in believers, empowering them to continue Jesus’ earthly work.

It is an astounding Gospel and very good news for any who has ears to hear and an open heart. Admittedly, it took me several years to be convinced of it as being True… oh but it is glorious!

A few thoughts:

– think of all the various religions, spiritualities and rituals that demand the shedding of blood and sacrifice. What does it mean if God Himself has become the sacrifice? What exactly are all the religions shedding blood for, anyway?

– The Bible tells us that no one can earn their way to God through their own efforts of work (Ephesians, Chapter 2). For me, I was quite shocked at this. I had spent years thinking that my own goodness and morality would be enough to find God, and I was upset to think that it wasn’t enough. However, I eventually realised that it was a great relief. How would I have known that I had done enough for God? How would I be able to tell between good and evil, for that matter? What place, then, do good deeds have in the Christian life?

Good books…

If you want to learn more on this topic there are countless resources out there. If you’ve only ever read anti-Jesus conspiracies, but consider yourself open-minded, you may want to check out the pro-Jesus books (to balance your views).

Some useful books are The Case for Christ by Lee Strobel, which takes a court case approach to the Gospel accounts of Jesus. The Jesus I Never Knew and What’s So Amazing About Grace? by Philip Yancey are fantastic books that really challenged all my assumptions about Christianity. Ravi Zacharias’ Jesus Among Other Gods is also a good book; and a fantastic read that really dissects the questions about Jesus and the Gospels is Mere Christianity by C. S. Lewis. Last time I checked they’re all readily available. You might want to try Australian bookstores like Koorong and Word.

Chunky Me – Further Musings On Low Self Esteem

Tuesday 3 June 2008 – 11.05 am

Last year I got quite sick, and the medication they put me on caused sudden weight gain. (It has ‘wonderful’ side effects like weight gain, bone weakness, indigestion, heart burn, adrenal gland failure… it’s basically a last-resort drug to keep one’s body from collapsing – woo hoo.)

It’s pretty depressing to now be 2 sizes larger than a year ago. I used to be ‘skinny.’ Now I just feel fat.  😦

My favourite clothes don’t fit anymore. I feel even worse than normal when I look in the mirror. I’ve got to do something about this.

*Chunky me walking in the shops next to adverts for attractive women’s clothes.

Tartan Pants And Hot Weather

 

Thursday 3 January, 2008  – 6.55 pm

It’s clearly too hot to wear my beloved tartan pants.

 (Note: it’s summer here at this time of year.)